The 90s Called, and They Want Their Attitudes Back

I know what you might be thinking from the headline—here we go again. Another rant about equality, ready to rip strips off men. 

But that is not what this is. 

I do not believe all men are the same. I believe in real equality—the kind where people are valued for exactly who they are, not judged by a demographic label. We all have different strengths and weaknesses. That is not a design flaw; it is just being human. 

Take my own home, for example. My husband and I do not assign chores based on an outdated rulebook; we just play to our individual preferences. He genuinely loves managing the garden and dealing with the heavy lifting. Me? I am far happier handling the cooking and the laundry. We balance each other out because we function as a team, not because we are trying to fit into rigid boxes. 

When it came to raising our kids, we made sure they knew how to survive on their own. I taught both our son and our daughter how to cook, clean, and run a household. No one is growing up here thinking they need to find a partner just to get through day-to-day life. Their dad brought his own strengths, too sharing his passions, watching sports with them, and teaching them how to switch off and just have fun. 

That is what equality looks like in real life. It is not forced or loud. It just works. 

But outside of my front door, I keep running into a completely different dynamic. It is a very specific, stubborn mindset that should have been left behind decades ago, yet somehow still lingers. 

I am talking about that casual, retro-sexism. The kind of thinking that still treats women’s opinions as secondary, or views equality as a threat to be managed rather than progress to be celebrated. You see it in the workplace when a woman is spoken over in a meeting, or at social gatherings when a lazy, sexist joke is thrown out under the guise of “just a bit of banter.” It has tired, and frankly, it is boring. 

And let us be clear: I am not talking about generations who grew up in a completely different era. I am talking about my own peers—those of us who became adults in the 1990s. 

We grew up during a massive cultural shift. We watched conversations about respect, opportunity, and inclusion become mainstream. We have had decades to learn, adapt, and grow. We have absolutely no excuse for holding onto prehistoric views. 

So, it is deeply disappointing—frustrating, even—to still see these outdated attitudes clinging on in mid-life. 

This is not an attack on men. It is a challenge to a specific behaviour. There are so many incredible men out there who support, respect, and uplift the people around them—men like my husband and my son. They are not threatened by equality; they are strengthened by it. Those are the men worth celebrating. 

The problem is not a demographic. The problem is a choice. It is the choice to carry an old, entitled mindset into a world that has moved on. 

And honestly? We are well past the point where that should be acceptable.